IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE TELL THEM BECAUSE HEARTS ARE OFTEN BROKEN BY WORDS LEFT UNSPOKEN!!!

As the year 2006 comes to an end I find myself thinking about the past and things in my life that I would like to change about myself and some habits I would like to kick. But not only am I thinking about the past, I am also looking to the future and how I can better not only my life but my son's as well. Sometimes it feels like my life has reached a "crossroad", do I take the path that is paved in gold and planned out for me so to speak or do I take the road less traveled?

For starters I honestly can't believe how fast this year went, it seems like only yesterday I was out celebrating my 21st birthday with my siblings and boyfriend at the time, but then I realize my 22nd birthday is just around the corner. So much has happened in my life this year, some good things and some things I would much rather forget and get behind me as soon as possible. But that’s life we all suffer good times and bad times, but we’re never given more than we can handle at once.


In the year 2006, I made some really awesome friends, one of which is my best friend Missy whom I would honestly be lost without. She has defiantly befriended me in a short amount of time and I can honestly say that we are like sisters and nothing will ever break the bond that we share. Not only did I gain a friend, but my son also gained three playmates because she has 3 kids. I’ve gotten in touch with old friends from school and ones I haven’t talked to in years and got caught up on their lives. I may have fallen out of love with someone I cared deeply for, but it doesn’t matter because I now realize that I am better off without him. Now that we’re not dating I know what kind of man he truly is. Something I would have never known because I was blinded by love and didn’t want to see the truth. I’ve lost loved ones that were very dear to me and I will miss them greatly, but though they may be gone they will never be forgotten because they will forever be in my heart. I’ve learned a lot about myself this year, developed a stronger bond with my son, made a difference in the lives of people I have met, saved lives, fought a couple fires, and lived life to it’s fullest. Not only that but this year I have made the decision to go back to school and further my education in the medical field. I personally have learned that you can accomplish and over come anything that life throws at you no matter how much you think other wise. Those who know me very well know the sorts of things that have dealt with in the last couple months. I am greatly thankful that I have such great friends who have stood by me through thick and thin. Some have seen or heard me at my worst when tears have streamed down my cheeks because I started to feel as if everything was crashing down around me. Guess what I’m still here, fighting the battle to keep my insanity, keeping my head held high and not letting anything get in the way of my dreams. I live this life and put up with everything that is dealt me for the sake of my son, he is my rock and my constant reminder why I endure the things I do.

As the year 2007 begins I plan on bettering myself and making positive changes in my life. Starting Jan 2, I will become a full time student majoring in nursing to become a Licensed Practical Nurse. It will be a long 18 months of hard work and dedication, but I know that I can do it because it’s something I want to do and a goal I want to achieve. I am setting another goal for myself and that is to cut back on my swearing, my close friends know just how much I swear and it’s crazy. Now that my son is to the age of repeating things and he’s starting to talk to more I have to be careful what I say around him. I don’t want my son being a foul mouthed child. Sometime this year I am going to learn how to drive, with me going back to school it’s a must because I am going to need to be able to get to and from school, as well as to and from clinical. This year I am going to be a better friend and keep in contact with my friends because losing touch with those I have known through the years sucks. Mainly because some of them have been with me through really tough times and I really want to return the favor. I’m going to forgive those who have hurt me in the past, mend broken friendships, and make new friends. I’m going to let go of old hurts in relationships because dwelling on what past loves have done to hurt me is preventing me from even coming close to being happy in possible new relationships. I’m going to work hard to becoming a more trusting person and not bottling my feelings up inside. I’m going to live the life I want and take the road less traveled, live life to it’s fullest. Do crazy things like dance in the rain, believe in love, miracles, and happy endings. I’m going to be a better mother to my son., teach him the things every child should know. Nothing is going to get in the way of my dreams and the life that I want for my son and I.